


The day, Hinata became a sex offender

by Shadoow (Chikita)



Series: Haikyuu Omo Stuff (English) [4]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Awkwardness, Desperation, Gen, Gen or Pre-Slash, Hinata is stupid, Kageyama is awkward, Omorashi, Pee, no wetting, pretty much crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-16
Updated: 2019-04-16
Packaged: 2020-01-14 11:22:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,662
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18475237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chikita/pseuds/Shadoow
Summary: Hinata gets desperate to pee on his walk home with Kageyama after downing three bottles of water during volleyball practice. When his bladder starts to fail him, there seems to be no other option but to go outside. This would have been okay if Hinata wasn't so anxious and weird about public urination. Omorashi, Very loosely translated from German.





	The day, Hinata became a sex offender

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [Omorashi One-Shots (German)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16621628) by [Shadoow (Chikita)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chikita/pseuds/Shadoow). 



> I realize this is super weird and it's not even a real translation at that point, but after translating the other fics, I just couldn't go with the pee shyness route. So basically, Hinata and Kageyama bond over pee. Set before the other stories. Sorry for the clickbait title but I kinda liked it.

It all started on a normal Tuesday afternoon. Volleyball practice had been exhausting as always and most of the players from Karasuno were glad to return home to their families and get some much-needed rest. Kageyama and Hinata had agreed on walking home together to spend the night at Kageyama’s, something that had become kind of a habit after they had started thinking of each other as friends instead of mortal enemies. Before going to sleep, they had planned to do a bit of studying for they had a difficult test at school the following day. Maybe it had been a bad idea not to ask Tsukishima or Yachi for help, but studying with someone, who was just as dumb, was still better, than not doing it at all.

Silently, the two walked side by side, Kageyama with his hands buried in his pockets and Hinata pushing his bike along the street as usual. It was strange to witness them all quiet for once, given that Hinata was usually the one who kept talking Kageyama’s ear off about a new volleyball technique one of the older players had been teaching him, or whatever gossip he had heard about a rival team.

This time, however, Kageyama kept turning his head towards Hinata, who looked the exact opposite of happy. His whole expression radiated discomfort with his face tensed up and his lips pressed together in a thin line. He was grabbing the handlebars of his bike firmly with both hands and his entire posture seemed stiffer than usual. It was concerning for someone who was usually jumping around cheerfully and getting on everyone’s nerves in the process.

Kageyama was about to put an end to the awkward silence by speaking up when Hinata suddenly stopped in his tracks and bent forward with a quiet whimper. He almost sounded in pain, and Kageyama would be worried if he couldn't already guess the reason for his friend's strange behavior.

“Ahh...Kageyama, I shouldn’t have finished that last bottle! I'm so stupid!”, Hinata moaned and from the corner of his eyes, Kageyama could see him shove a hand between his legs, using the other one to keep his bike from falling over, as he did a weird kind of potty dance. Now, he was making it quite obvious.

“Yeah, you are. You could have gone to the bathroom before we left, dumbass!”, Kageyama snapped at him, shaking his head at his friend’s general lack of common sense. He had already told him during practice, that drinking that much water would only make him feel bloated and sick, but when did he ever listen to him anyway? Regardless, it had been pretty warm this afternoon, almost hot for a normal day in early spring, so staying hydrated was important, even though it certainly didn’t mean downing three water bottles in the span of an hour.

“Don't be mean! You know, that the bathrooms at the gym were out of order and I…”, the next part came out a bit softer, “I thought, that I could easily wait until we’re at your house.” Groaning in annoyance, Kageyama put his hands on his hips and shoot his partner a doubtful look. He didn’t seem like someone who could “easily wait”. He wasn’t sure if the word “waiting” was even a part of Hinata’s vocabulary.

“You’re not going to wet yourself, are you? You didn’t leave any spare clothes the last time you’ve visited, and you can’t wear mine, they won’t fit,” he said and Hinata immediately reacted with a violent shaking of his head.

“N-No, of course not! I’m not a child, I can definitely hold it until we’re at your home,” he said a little louder than necessary and forced himself to put both of his hands back on the handlebars, his right leg twitching nervously as he did.

“I hope so,” was the last thing Kageyama said before they both continued their walk down the street. It wasn’t as if he couldn’t understand, why Hinata was acting so stubbornly. Even though they were friends, their old rivalry was still intact, and showing even the slightest form of weakness was almost an invitation for ridicule when you weren’t on the best terms. Kageyama just wished that Hinata wouldn’t overestimate his bladder capacity the way he himself had done on that dreadful bus ride with his old volleyball team. The simple memory of Oikawa’s amused expression made him cringe in embarrassment.

“Hurry up a bit, will you? We still need to study for that stupid test and my parents are gonna kill me if I mess that one up as well,” he tried to make Hinata adapt to his pace. His friend had slowed down noticeably, stopping at increasingly shorter intervals and if Hinata honestly thought, that his desperate gestures weren’t obvious, he was definitely on the wrong track. Hinata could never hide anything from him, he was so easy to read most of the time, especially when he had to pee.

“Don’t rush me, Bakagayama!”, he complained and started shifting his weight from one foot to the other, grinding his legs together and almost knocking over his whole bike with all the fidgeting he was doing, “We still have all evening for that, so it’s okay if we take our time.” One more phrase, that Kageyama didn’t think he would ever hear from his usually hyperactive and impatient teammate.

“The sooner we’re there, the sooner you can go to the bathroom. Ever thought about that?”, he asked in his usual rough tone and saw, how Hinata’s huge brown eyes suddenly lit up before a pathetic squeak escaped his lips. Almost reflexively, he let go off his bike to grab his crotch with both hands, bending forwards again and squirming on the spot. Kageyama managed to get hold of the bike just in time and looked over at his friend in honest concern, who was now almost squatting on the ground, his hands helplessly clutching at his groin.

“Kageyama, I-I think I have to go more badly than I’d thought. Ohh shit, give me a second!”, he gasped out of breath and tried to straighten up again, but his body didn’t seem to listen. His legs were trembling and his eyes looked glassy as if he was about to start crying at any moment soon. Now, not even Kageyama could hide his concern anymore. They still had a long way to go and then they had to unlock the door first and walk up the stairs, and how the hell was Hinata going to be able to hold out until then, when it seemed like he was _already_ about to burst?”

“If it’s that bad, you can just go behind a tree, I guess,” he suggested the next thing that came to his mind. Hinata only grimaced at his words and started pouting, with his lower lip sticking out and his face scrunched up, as he bobbed desperately on the spot.  
“Do you see any trees around here?”, he asked and at that point, Kageyama realized, that they weren’t even near any sort of greenery, unless they counted the weeds growing between the paving stones. There wasn’t really anything to duck behind and pee in a discreet manner, nor were there any public bathrooms.

“Let’s just go to your house! It’s not that far and I’m sure I can hold it,” Hinata said after their short break and looked at Kageyama with the most determined expression, anyone, who was about to soak himself in a matter of minutes, could possibly muster. He still had his left hand pressed against his crotch and didn’t try to hide, how he was repeatedly pinching himself through the thin fabric of his shorts, now that his desperation wasn’t a secret anymore. Kageyama felt a blush going up his neck at the sight, and quickly averted his eyes.

“You’re getting on my nerves,” Kageyama snorted and resumed walking again. This time, he deliberately walked more slowly, giving Hinata a chance to keep up with him. He would never admit, that he was doing him a favor, but he felt like rushing him now would only trigger his absurdly small bladder to give up more quickly. He really didn’t want that to happen, as much as Hinata probably deserved to have an accident for drinking all this stupid water. 

Huffing quietly, Kageyama glanced sideways at Hinata, who seemed to be struggling with every step, barely moving forward. It took them maybe a few minutes in which they hadn’t even managed to cross the next street when Hinata seemed to finally throw in the towel.

“Kageyama, how far is it to your house? Are we almost there? It's just around the next corner, right? Right??”, he asked in a desperate voice and tried to cross his legs without losing his balance, still squirming around like crazy and grabbing himself so hard, Kageyama feared he would hurt himself at some point. His face was contorted in a grimace and he was almost panting now, his breath coming out in little gasps.  
“You’ve been to my house about twenty times, you should know,” Kageyama said, but was immediately interrupted by Hinata’s panicked voice reaching out to him again.

“I know this sounds weird, but I really don’t think I can hold it for another five minutes. I shouldn’t have finished that last bottle. I should have used the bathroom at school!”, he whined and looked at the ground in shame, his normal complexion now replaced with a rich shade of red, the color of Nekoma’s uniform, “I have to pee so badly, I don’t know what to do!”

“Hey, we still have three blocks to go. If we hurry, we’ll be there in less than ten minutes,” Kageyama tried to encourage Hinata to keep walking, even though he had just confessed, that five minutes were already too much for him to take, “You’re not giving up that soon, are you? You’re not that weak.” Maybe appealing to his competitive side would work. Hinata looked up at him with watering eyes. He seemed to actually consider taking the bait, when, without warning, a violent shudder made him change his mind quickly. He shook his head and another whimper escaped his throat, causing him to shut his eyes, his brows knitted together tightly.

“I don’t think I can do it. I’m almost leaking, it’s so bad!” he whispered frantically and Kageyama was instinctively alarmed at his behavior, so he quickly grabbed his friend's right arm and started to drag him along, maybe a bit too roughly. A loud thump was heard, as Hinata’s bike hit the ground, and Kageyama ignored Hinata’s complaints about it. He was about to save Hinata’s dignity here, so he’d better be thankful. Without thinking, he took the next turn, which led them through a narrow, dimly lit alleyway. Not the most sophisticated option, but perfect for emergencies like these.

“Kageyama, what the hell? Were you trying to rip off my arm? That'd hurt, you brute! You almost made me pee myself!”, Hinata cried out after he had managed to break away from Kageyama's grip, and glared at him in exasperation. His eyes were wide open and he stood there shaking, with his hands wedged between his tightly crushed legs, as if he was about to lose it right there and then.  
“I’m trying to help you, dumbass!”, Kageyama growled, waving his hands through the air, “If you can’t make it to my house, you’ll just have to do it here.” 

Hinata shot him a look, that could only be described as a mix of disbelief and horror as if Kageyama had suggested they quit volleyball and start taking ballet lessons from now on. Thinking about it, Hinata would probably look funny in one of those white dresses.

“But, we’re in public! We're not allowed to pee on the street! Someone could see and I'd get in trouble, just because you've told me to do it!”, he complained and started fidgeting again, his face still flushed and Kageyama was honestly surprised, that he was still trying to hold it after he’d told him a few seconds ago, that he was almost leaking already.

“It’s not like there’s any other option. There aren’t any “legal” places for you to go around here,” Kageyama said in a borderline sarcastic tone, frowning at his desperate friend. He really didn’t get why Hinata was acting so strangely. It wasn’t as if he had just asked him to undress and dance samba in front of the assembled team, with Ennoshita taking pictures for the monthly volleyball magazine.

“But, you never pee anywhere outside, either. You’re just gonna make fun of me, you’ve already said I’m weak,” Hinata replied with a grim expression on his face, and Kageyama wanted to strangle him on the spot for dragging him into this embarrassing situation, instead of just relieving himself, before his bladder was actually going to burst.

“I’m not making fun of you and I’m not calling you weak, dumbass. I’ve done it before, okay? It’s better than walking home with wet clothes,” he said, regretting, that he’d said anything in the first place when he felt a shiver of embarrassment running down his back. He could still remember some close calls where he had to make a quick stop behind some bushes in the park so he wouldn’t flood his pants on the way home after a long bus ride, but he preferred to neither think nor talk about those. That wasn’t a good topic to talk about anyway, not even with a close friend.

“I...suppose you're right. I really don't want to wet myself, that'd be embarrassing. So...am I supposed to just pee on the wall over there? The one where someone wrote "Fuck the police" three times over?”, Hinata asked clumsily, looking around the narrow alley as if it was of vital importance to choose the right spot for it. For some reason he was making the whole situation even more complicated than it should have been.  
“Literally nobody cares. For fuck's sake, just do it!”, Kageyama growled in annoyance and leaned on the other side of the brick wall, his arms folded over his chest.

“Fine, I'll do it. I can’t hold it any longer anyway! Turn around, I don't want you to watch!”, Hinata said and the desperate tone of his voice made it obvious, that he really meant it this time. Huffing, Kageyama did as he was told and turned his head in the opposite direction, waiting for Hinata to finally do his business, so they could go home and study for their test. He wasn’t sure if they would even have enough time left for that. It was getting pretty late and dinner was probably cold by now.

After a few seconds, he clearly heard the sound of Hinata unzipping in a seemingly frantic manner, followed by a strangled gasp and the sound of his sneakers shuffling on the ground. He kept waiting, wondering, why he couldn’t hear any kind of splattering noise on the asphalt. After a few seconds, he was getting somewhat impatient, and decided to check if his friend had some kind of problem. Instantly, Hinata's head whipped around as if someone had tried to snap his neck, and he started blushing like crazy.  
“Hey, I’ve told you not to look!”, he whined with his hands clutched over his unzipped shorts and underwear as if they hadn’t already seen each other butt-naked a hundred times in the showers after practice.

“Stop freaking out! I’m not looking at your dick! What the hell’s taking you so long? Are you waiting for the wind to turn? I thought you were desperate?”, Kageyama asked dumbfounded, not getting what Hinata’s problem was this time. First, he had told him, that he could easily wait until they got home, then he couldn’t wait and was about to wet himself any second, and now he had some kind of trouble relieving himself outside when he clearly needed to? The guy was driving him insane. Hinata was the last person he’d ever expected to be bladder shy.

Hinata turned back to the wall, clearly uncomfortable and started chewing on his lip. There was something up with him and Kageyama didn't believe it was simple shyness. Hinata never had a problem with announcing his bathroom breaks or speaking up (aka yelling) when he needed a break on one of their bus trips. He had always been pretty outspoken about basically everything.

“I’m too nervous,” Hinata finally admitted in a quiet voice and swallowed thickly, “I’m scared, that someone will catch me peeing on that wall and throw me in jail. I’ve heard that in some parts of the world, you can even end up on some kind of sex offender list for public peeing, and I really don’t want to be on a sex offender list! I don’t think sex offenders can go to nationals.”

“That’s bullshit and you know it,” Kageyama said, inwardly facepalming at his friend’s ridiculous paranoia, “Nobody thinks you’re a sex offender. They’ll probably just look at your size and think you’re a child with a weak bladder or something.” Hinata scrunched up his face at the last sentence and started squirming on the spot again, still openly grasping himself through his halfway unzipped shorts and biting his lip so hard, Kageyama feared he would draw blood at some point. This was ridiculous. He was so obviously bursting and still holding himself back for utterly stupid reasons.

“Just go and do your business already, you’re making a fool out of yourself!”, Kageyama almost yelled in frustration at his friend’s antics, “You can be absolutely sure, that nobody will come and throw you in jail. And if anyone _does_ complain, I'll just punch them in the face or something.” Of course, there was always the possibility of someone walking past, but Hinata wasn’t some weird drunk, who just whipped out his junk in the middle of a crosswalk in bright daylight. They were in an abandoned alleyway and it was already getting dark outside. Nobody would give a damn about anyone peeing there.

“Could you at least make sure no one’s coming?”, Hinata asked, his voice sounding panicky, as he fiddled with the hem of his boxers. Sighing, Kageyama nodded and did as requested, turning his head, as he had done before, to give his friend some resemblance of privacy. He hadn’t expected this simple pee break to drag out as long as it did. And everyone always made fun of _him_ for being weird about bathroom related issues. But maybe encouraging each other to pee on random walls in the middle of town was just something friends did, like some kind of bonding activity. Hinata had been his first real friend, so maybe he had just missed this part of growing up until now.

“The coast is clear,” he finally said, and before he could rack his brain over how ridiculous the whole situation was, his thoughts were interrupted by a loud splattering noise, as if someone had just turned on a faucet, followed by a relieved, almost euphoric sigh. Kageyama hadn’t realized he was holding his breath and slowly exhaled. This was kind of awkward. Sure, Hinata was just peeing and that should be the most normal thing in the world, but it sounded more like he was trying to dig holes into the wall with his stream alone. He certainly hadn’t lied about it being urgent, given that he was still going full blast twenty seconds in. Apparantly, he didn't have a super small bladder either.

It couldn’t have lasted longer than a minute, but to Kageyama, it had felt like an eternity of awkwardness. As the final dribble had died down, the familiar sound of the zipper could be heard again, followed by another blissful sigh from Hinata. Kageyama took that as a sign to turn around and look at his partner again, who beamed at him, as if they had just won nationals together, exhausted, but satisfied. His cheeks were red, but he didn’t seem embarrassed at all. So much for being shy.

“I feel better now. That was super close, I think you’ve saved my butt today,” he said with a dopey smile and wiped his hands on his shorts, before skipping ahead and looking at Kageyama over his shoulder, “You were right. Peeing in alleys is kinda fun. We should do it together someday.” Kageyama wanted to clarify, that this wasn’t about “fun” at all, but he thought it was better to stay silent and not give his friend any more weird ideas.

After taking a final glance at the enormous puddle, that hadn’t completely soaked into the ground yet, he wondered, how someone so tiny could even keep that much liquid inside, without literally dying. That must have been painful to hold in. Frowning, as usual, he followed Hinata and helped him pick up his bike, so they could finally go home. 

Fortunately, his neighborhood was close to their current spot. It was already pitch black outside and they still had to study for the test. Kageyama was afraid they would probably spend the rest of the evening doing anything but studying. After all, most activities were more interesting than homework, even watching bad commercials on tv, raiding the fridge for some leftover food and trying to suffocate each other with pillows, aka “pillow fights”, or at least that’s how Hinata called them. 

Kageyama just dearly hoped that Hinata wouldn’t challenge him to some kind of holding contest or bring up the whole “peeing together”-thing again. He feared, that Hinata actually had the larger capacity between the two of them, and he really _really_ didn’t want Hinata to beat him at this specific thing. But knowing himself, he wasn’t one to run away from a challenge any day...

**Author's Note:**

> Dumb Headcanon: Middle school!Kageyama has absolutely wet himself during a bus ride with Kitaichi, and his awkward behavior around Oikawa partly stems from the fact, that he's afraid he will spill it to his new team.
> 
> Yes, I have hundreds of those. #9301 on Discord if ya wanna chat.


End file.
